"I Am Crying Right Now" Over A Tooth

My kid lost a tooth tonight. We somehow misplaced the lost tooth within an hour of it falling out of his head and you would think his right foot has been amputated and misplaced. My goodness. I am blaming the drama on the day-after-a-sugar-hangover, which, I do believe, is worse than any alcohol hangover. At least with booze you just wanna lie down all day. These kids are jacked up and crazed, which is why the candy has left the building. The kid who wrote this note to the tooth fairy tonight talked with me the other day about dying. Matter of factly, he stated that when I die he'd miss me forever, but that he knows that I'm going to die before him, and so that's just how it's gonna be so he's not gonna cry about it everyday should he think about it. How emotionally hearty he is, I thought.

Fast forward to tonight -- he is weeping over a lost tooth that a freaking fairy is about to take away anyways. Just when you think sanity is moving into their frontal lobe, they like to show you.

I'm about to sneak into his own money jar to get out some of his own dollars to give back to him for his own tooth because I cannot attempt a trip out for cash at this time of the night. Is it midnight right now? That is what I continue to ask for days after the time change. Under my shawl. While watching Wheel of Fortune... I wish.

But who has cash anymore these days? I never do. Go ahead and rob me. You'd get a couple of band-aids, an ugly picture of me on my driver's license, random receipts that I continue to keep, a couple of gift cards I keep thinking I'll get to use, and probably a kid's baby tooth which is jingling around in there somewhere.

EssaysAnne FlavinComment